Blonde on Blonde: Fat Babies, Michelle Obama, and Jesus
Like the child that he is, Imus forgot his lunch at home today, but figured Deirdre would bring it with her to Fox for today’s edition of Blonde on Blonde. Aptly, Lis Wiehl asked Imus, “Is Deirdre your mommy?”
Since he won’t be eating lunch, Imus doesn’t run the risk of becoming chubby, like some babies whose mothers are putting them on diets. Though Deirdre and Lis cooed that fat babies are cute, Imus’s reaction was, “Coochie coochie coo, you fat little bastard!”
Sadly, many of the health problems children experience are not their fault. “It starts in utero,” Deirdre said. “When women become pregnant, they have to be conscious of the chemicals they’re exposed to and the food that they eat, because the chemicals are the things that are endocrine disruptors.”
Endocrine disruptors can cause obesity and a host of other genetic problems. “Babies are born pre-polluted now,” Deirdre pointed out.
Lis, classifying herself as someone who is “living in the real world,” balked at the notion of putting a child or a baby on a diet. “It depends what diet means,” Deirdre countered. “It can mean you have your child in a healthy lifestyle, preventing them from all those exposures.”
Along those lines, Sarah Palin said recently on Laura Ingraham’s radio show that First Lady Michelle Obama should “get off our back” with her anti-childhood obesity campaign.
Lis conceded that Palin “might have a point,” but thinks Michelle has every reason to be involved in this issue—even though, as Deirdre pointed out, every time the first family does a photo-op, they’re downing cheeseburgers and French fries.
“Everything in moderation,” Lis said. Bad move.
“I’m not at my home stuffing my face with cheeseburgers,” Deirdre, a strict vegan, said, and shot down Lis’s protest that the Obama family is hardly hefty. “It’s not just a weight issue. If people want to be healthy, they shouldn’t be eating like that.”
A school in Oregon recently showed students a Veterans Day video that featured Jesus Christ embracing fallen soldiers. The clip is only a few seconds long, but it has stirred debate over the separation of church and state.
“If it’s put on by the school, you can’t encourage or prohibit any kind of religion,” Lis, an attorney, said. “I know I sound PC, but that’s the law.”
So, in other words, Lis hates Jesus? “It sounds to me like you hate him,” Imus said. He added, “We’re sick of people hating on Jesus!”
Deirdre, also a Jesus lover, is particularly sick of artwork depicting people peeing on Jesus or throwing elephant dung (literally) on Jesus.
Finally finding something they could all agree on as the segment drew to a close, Imus happily declared, “We don’t want elephant dung on Jesus!”
Amen.
-Julie Kanfer
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